BUFFALO, N.Y. — The mass shooting at a Buffalo grocery store that police say was committed by an 18-year-old man radicalized by white supremacist ideology has left Western New York torn apart and searching for answers .
For many parents, confronting the ideology espoused by the murder suspect means having difficult conversations with their children about the realities of violence and racism in the United States.
"One of my sons is 18, and his very first question was like, 'Mom, how can someone my age do something so heinous?'" Reverend Denise O said. Walden-Glenn "How do you explain that to your child?"
Walden-Glenn is a mother of 12 and executive service chief for VOICE - a social activism group in Buffalo.
When she learned of Saturday's shooting that left 10 black people dead and three others injured, she immediately thought of how she could support her community, including her children, ages 13 to 26.
When NPR spoke with Walden-Glenn on Monday, she said her school-age children didn't go to school that day. The emotional burden, she said, was too much for children to expect in a classroom.
"We have suffered such a violent violation and we are so shaken," she said. "I don't understand what it feels like to expect life to go on as normal when there is nothing normal about what we just experienced."
Tyrell Ford also works at VOICE. He is the father of two young boys, who he says are too young to fully process the scale of Saturday's attack.
"I don't think they fully understand until they get a bit older and start to see the world for what it really is," Ford said. "And that's the risk we run by exposing them to the dark side of the world so soon.
"My wife took the opportunity, as we discussed, to talk to them, to let them know that there are people here who will target you based on the color of your skin, and to be vigilant all the time. time, even though they are so young."
Since the attack, Ford, who is black, said he and his wife had discussed buying a gun. He said the shooting had sparked a redoubled sense of protectionism towards his family.
"The war against black and brown bodies is real, and we don't know when the next opportunity will come," he said.
At a vigil Tuesday on the block where the Tops supermarket is located, still cordoned off with yellow police tape, strangers gathered to pray, sing and support each other.
Danielle Wisinski was there with her two teenage daughters. They had laid flowers at the wake. Balloons and other commemorations of lost lives were piled high.
Wisinski, who is white, fought back tears as she explained how she and her husband sought to raise their children to see everyone as equals.
"I'm just being honest with them — my husband and I always have been," she said. "We teach them that we are all one human race and that things like this should not happen."
His two daughters, Julia, 19, and Sarah, 17, said they were shocked that someone so young could be so radicalized to carry out such violence.
"It's just awful that so many young people can be influenced like this to do bad things," Julia said.
His sister, Sarah, said: "It was really infuriating to me that this could happen so close to home."
Their confusion was echoed by Alina, 5, who was at the Tuesday vigil with her parents and younger sister, helping distribute food and nappies alongside the family church group.
"We actually just talked to him before we came," said Candice Erni, his mother. “I didn't go into details, just let him know that an individual injured a lot of people in a grocery store. And we've left it at that for now. Of course, children have a whole lot of questions.
Erni, whose family is black, said his daughter asked him if the shooter attacked the store because he had a bad day or if evil was responsible.
“We let him know that someone who held opinions contrary to the word of God decided to act out of fear and violence rather than peace,” Erni said.
Alina was happy to be with her family and helping the community, but as the sun set over Tops, the 5-year-old had one more question.
"How did it happen?"
His mother had no response.
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